How To Be a Winner

My topic for today might stir the water a bit…I don’t know.

But anyhow, here we go.

It’s about competition or being competitive.

I have to say, I feel quite strongly about this topic and in this post, I’ll tell you why. I know, not everybody is going to agree with me, and that’s fine. That’s what makes the world an interesting place. Everybody has the freedom to have their own opinions and make their own decisions.

“Go Big or Go Home,” They Say

Especially in the business environment of today – whether online or offline - being a “competitive person” is a must. The same goes for the sports world. If you are not a competitive person, the odds are against you. It’s almost like if you are not competitive then “what are you doing here”?

I totally get this and I agree with it. But, what I feel strongly about is where you focus that competitiveness.

I believe competition can be (and often is) healthy. But I have seen how "competition" can also cause a lot of damage when it gets out of control.

Competition Can Make or Break You

In my opinion, nobody can say, “I can handle any competition that comes my way” unless you’ve been there and you’ve been through the mill.

Before you can decide to be competitive, you need to be very clear who or what you are going to compete with and why.

You need to know that you are naturally talented or that you’ve got what it takes to become good at it. Then you need to know how to control your desire for competition and where to focus it. And this I believe is extremely important.

Competition can be great...or it can be disastrous.

It is always great for the person (or team) who is on the winning side, but there has to be a loser too (or at least second, third etc.). And if that “loser” doesn’t have his/her focus in the right place from the word "go", it can be the beginning of the end.

Even for a winner to become a real winner, you need those “losses” to build character and gain experience before you can really call yourself a winner.

I’ve seen it many times over, where a real talented person can start off with a winning streak. He/she then becomes overconfident and…my oh my…when that first time pops up and they face harsh competition, everything falls apart and it can get real ugly. It often ends up where such a person gets so demoralized and shaken that they just can’t get back on track and sooner than later, they just quit.

On the opposite side, it might be someone with really good talent, but due to inexperience or whatever, they just need to find their feet. If their focus is on the other person (or company) who they are in competition with, the battle is often lost before it even started. If only they knew where to focus that competitive spirit…

Who is The Competition and Why?

I’ve been involved in sports in a teaching/coaching capacity on a professional level for many years. It was my full-time job.

The first thing I would teach my students was to first compete with themselves before they would even consider competing with their opponents.

The danger in seeing your opponent as the primary competition (whether on the sports field or in business) is that it becomes intimidating. It becomes a threat.

You should start by competing with yourself. Study the "competition" and then see how you can improve on what he/she is doing.

Then you go out and "compete". But actually you are competing with yourself because you want to see if you can "outwit" your opponent with what you have practiced (or prepared).

If you can't, no harm is done. Try to determine what the opponent has done to win the day. If you can do that, and you know that you have given your best, you are still a winner. You haven't lost anything, because you learned something! Now you can go back and be better prepared for the next encounter until you can beat the opponent at what you do.

Then, when you start winning those physical encounters, you still study the "external competition" (opponent/s) to stay on top.

I love what the famous Bruce Lee once said. He said "I will never say that I am the best, but I will never admit that I am second-best either".

How To Be A Winner

The big secret is, be the best you that you can be. Never compare yourself to anybody else.

The fact is, never hold yourself to someone else's standards. Do the best you can do and if you can improve, then do so. If you can't improve and someone else can do better, give credit where it is due and don't break yourself up about it. To be a winner doesn't mean you always have to better than everybody else at everything. Just be the best version of yourself that you can be and keep trying. Be consistent.

If you just cannot improve at what you do, it might be time to evaluate if what you are doing is worth your time and effort, or is there something else you might be doing better. Be brave enough to be realistic.

Moving on does not make you a loser, it is called wisdom.