Letter To My Son - Primary School Times- Part 4

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(Edited)

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This personal story I am drafting will be my gift to my son on his 18th birthday in six months' time, this and a video game because what 18-year-old is looking forward to a very long letter from his dad?

Over the last 18 years, I struggled to be a dad, just like my dad struggled before me. I was very lucky to share lots of time with you in the past, but the divorce changed that.

Now that you are an adult I wanted to tell you my story. A story that I wish my dad had told me. Maybe it's too early right now, but you might enjoy it when you get to be old and sentimental like me.

Click Back to Start with Part 1

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Letter To My Son Part 4

So where were we, well you were in the Alpujara and I was in Granada and those were not the best of times. It took two years to get everything sorted and find a house for us all to live in near Granada.

During those years we did not really move ahead, it was like I was struggling through the weeks to see you and your mom for a couple of hours over the weekend.

The bright sight, I had a job.
On the dark side we did not get much more stable financially but at least there was a steady income. I still wonder if that was worth missing you for, I guess it was the price I paid for having so much time with you before the Primary School Times.

But we now had enough money to buy you cool presents
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Moving Back To Granada

Once back in Granada, you did so well in school, you still hated it but you hated getting bad grades even more. That disgust for school always came in the shape of tummy aches. I walked you to the bus so many times with you complaining about that pain, it only got better when you got Maestro Rapha.

I still wonder what caused it.
Was it that horrible school in Ogijares or did something happen in that weird little school in GBayarcal? It seems that the headmistress over there also had some very crazy tactics to make kids walk her way. Locking them up in classrooms without any light and telling them that she loved them better than their own parents.

School is so overrated....

So is work. To keep up with our lifestyle, I started to work overtime. I spend every Saturday and Sunday morning filing forms to bring in some extra bucks.

When we went to Mojacar I would get up 2 hours before you and your mom and spend those on the toilet filing forms just to pay for the holiday.

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The Good, The Pretty, and The Father

Financially we were doing better, but your mom's health was getting worse. That meant we had to rely on workawayers (people that help out for food and a place to sleep) more and more.
We had the good, the bad, and the mediocre ...we even had one (or two) we both liked a lot. Although I liked her a lot before you even were born.

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I was really happy that we were living all together in one house again, even though it meant I was busy all the time. Getting you ready for school, doing homework after dinner, walking the dogs...the best walks were when you joined. Somehow that just made it more work, and much more fun.

It sometimes felt as if I joined the dark side, the corporate side, but I hope that even then you knew that I am your Father.

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One of my favorite memories from those day is you and I learning the whole lyrics of this next song. We also tried to sing it, but as I do have a horrible singing voice I let you take the lead.:

It´s a kind of Magic

Another great Memory is Magic The Gathereing.

You were more and more drawn Manga & Magic The Gathering. I think you were 10 years old when we build your first deck and went to the card shop where we played our first tournament.

We played together and even though you were the youngest by far, you beat guys that were much older. And yes we lost most of the matches, but you learned and kept going.

You always kept going, ever since you crawled out of the egg.

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In that sense, you resemble your dad a lot. We don´t quit we just keep walking. And we both had to because times got hard. I am not sure if there is a clear thing that caused it, but if I do need to give a root cause why things got so difficult between your mom and me it´s that we grew apart.

Those years in Loma Verde your mom often could not leave her room, that meant we had workawayers all the time helping us out. For me those were busy times.

I would get up early in the morning to feed and walk the four dogs (and three cats).

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Then have a coffee and prepare your breakfast and my lunch. I would wake you up once I was done, and get you ready for school.

After I made you brush your hair and teeth (with different brushes of course) I would make sure there was a workawayer awake to bring you to the bus.

Then I would leave the house, go to work and be back around six. Back home I had a quick chat with your mom and you about your day, before helping you with your homework and making dinner.

After dinner we would do some homework if any, I would pack your backpack because if I would leave that up to you...you were sure to forget half of your stuff everyday.

The A for Forgetting

How many times did I find a letter from school, that you were supposed to give to us...but forgot about. If you could get a grade for forgetting you would have gotten an A for sure.

We really tried to make you sleep in your own room, but due to so many circumstances, you always ended up in my room. Even when I put you to bed in yours I was sure to wake up and find you next to me.

And I did not mind really, your mom needed her rest and I was happy to have some time with you now that I was away so much.

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And even though our lives got busier we made time for crazy fun stuff and mud baths.


Thank you for reading.
Click The Next Button for The Next Chapter.

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All Pictures Are Mine


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13 comments
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aww that is lovely, can hear ya on this my son is 12!

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Awesome, I really hate that I feel there was always so much going on that it was hard to live in the now, on the other hand looking back like this there were a lot of nows.

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I am lucky I work at home in my studio apart from occasional work trips so I get to see him a lot...for better or for worse lol

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I hear you reading this. For years after leaving Holland it was mostly trying to get back on track, work work work, and not really much money or time left to live in the moment. Just stress for years :(

That's why I'm now all for getting out as much as we can, even if it's just to have a tapa somewhere or walk on the beach. I want to make up for the lost time we were stuck inside.

It's not easy to live from paycheck to paycheck, it's an ongoing struggle and I'm happy that that's behind us now.

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Same here AMEN!

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I think we all worked hard to get there, so well-deserved :)

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These pictures are so lovely, I hope he will love this effort you made by writing this all down..

PS These kittens are adorable, is the black one Neyo?

!PIMP

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No we got Neyo from the bakery after this black one did not come home. They were free to go in and out Loma Verde and in the end only the ginger came back....till he did not come back. Then we were left with Neyo and Petrol somehow they did not go as far as the others did.

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Ah ok, I think you probably told us that back then but I didn't remember lol.

I remember Neyo escaping a few times and we had a hard time getting him back in the gate. I remember that I found Neyo so big for a cat, now all I see are HUGE cats, male or female it doesn't even matter, these adults are all huge.

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You should have seen that Ginger when it was full grown, bigger than any cat I ever seen and I saw him fight with an Iguana. He was called Morisson and he was sleeping all day....and hunting all night. When I would walk the dogs at 7 in the morning he would come home from his nightly escapades.

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Haha, seems like he's a bit like Mochi. We decided he's allowed to go outside again now that he's castrated and won't knock up any of the ladies. He also made a friend, a ginger cat who had some needles from a cactus in his fur. BF could take it out after weeks of luring him to the window :) Now he's Mochi's play buddy, he felt so at home that 2x he entered the living room to eat Mochi's food when we didn't put any outside (true story).

Now sometimes Mochi leaves (or escapes like last week through the mosquito net lol) in the evening and walks back home in the morning. Funnily enough, he seems to be the only male cat around that doesn't end up in a cactus.

He changed for the better when we decided he could go out, and it's much better for us too as we can open the window and have some fresh air instead of having it closed all day.

I wonder how big he will get though he seems to be growing by the day and these claws, my god you probably know what huge claws and nails look like if you had that ginger big cat.. It's great that he's not hostile towards us, otherwise he could do serious damage.

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