Relationships, Changes & Nostalgia

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Yesterday while at our aunt's interment, we had a good time catching up with first cousins whom we hadn't seen in a long time. It's funny that while some of us live just hours away from each other and with the technology we have today, we seldom connect. Back when we were kids, we used to spend every family occasion with everyone in the clan - Christmas, graduation, birthday parties, picnics, and even trips to the beach.

There were times when whoever was taking a photo of us all together would have to go farther away to get everyone. It was fun those days, especially when our grandparents were still around. Extended families were also joining us then.


Well, things changed.

We grew older, we had different priorities, our grandparents passed away and everyone moved on, got so busy that while family get-togethers were initiated in the past, some were still unable to attend. One common reason was that most of us (cousins) settled down far away from each other (which wasn't an issue before with our parents who also lived far apart from their siblings yet they still met). Sad to say, but most of us (including our parents and their siblings), only get to meet during wakes or like yesterday, funerals.

That's the case not only on my maternal side of the family but also on my father's side. While our relationships are still good and not estranged, we just kind of slowly fell out of touch over the years. Unlike when we were younger, the usual annual reunions or gatherings are no more.

Some of my cousins didn't even know where one of our uncles lived and had never been to his house. It's forgivable understandable though because he and his family live in another region. We teased each other, all-knowing of our misgivings, and laughed things out afterward. Then we bade goodbye, each headed to their own homes. We did hope for a common thing - that our next meeting wouldn't be a funeral but something happy.


The husband and I were reflecting upon things on the way home. It occurred to us that our grandparents may have been the ones who kept our bond during those years. Things changed drastically when they were gone.

We couldn't help but wonder how things will be too when our niblings (nieces and nephews) will grow older and have their own families and priorities. While we often celebrate together these years and meet on most family occasions, we never know in the years to come, especially when our parents will no longer be around.

Would I and my siblings lose touch? Will the husband and his sisters do the same thing? Or the bond will continue as it is now? We agreed that only time will tell, for no matter how much we want to keep things the way they are today, changes will occur, things will happen, and we certainly do not have control over everything.

This reminded me of my group of best friends (4 of us) who some 20 years ago when we were all single, vowed to always find time to spend together over beer or Tequila, even when we were married and had kids. Guess what? We rarely meet and haven't had drinks for ages and the two are now overseas. Well, at least my BFF and I are seeing each other a few times each year.


It was nice to reminisce about those years when our families were a lot closer to each other despite the physical distances. When friendships were deeper, more real, and warmer. It brought some nostalgia and a heartfelt wish too - that what we have today with our siblings and best friends, will not fade and that the bond will remain strong as time passes by, no matter where life takes us, or the miles that may come between us.

Happy new week, everyone! May your relationships withstand the test of time and distance.😉


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Photo Credits: Athena / RDNE Stock project / Elevate

Nostalgic & Reflective Sunday. 17032024/20:30ph

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Time changes and we can't keep everything... So it's really sad when we are being parted from people dear to us. We can't keep our promises, only change is permanent...
I suddenly wonder how we will be 20 years from now..
!LADY

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That's so right sis, and it's okay. At least we have something to remember as we live on hehe.

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Time changes and situations reveal people's intent. Other times, life becomes so overbearing that we could hardly catch our breath in all I think we should do better in sustaining connections and family ties by actually creating time for it.

I did cut off some friends who were supposed to be my besties but weren't there when I needed them. I came out of my dark moments and still reached out but it felt like a bother so I just let them because not every connection is worth sustaining in my own opinion

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I agree with you. We need to intentionally connect and make time if we want to keep our connections. You did great by cutting off those kinds of friends. It is not worth it. At least you tried but it's their lost :)

Thank you, !LADY for sharing your thoughts.

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(Edited)

Thank you 🌹
Their loss really and I'm glad that chapter is closed 🙂

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I can understand and I feel it's normal because everyone is getting busy with their own life and managing time for others is not so easy. I think family reunited again in someone's death or someone's wedding.
!PIZZA

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That's true. Growing apart is normal I think. But it's good that sometime in the past, we had good times together.

!PIZZA

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(Edited)

PIZZA!

$PIZZA slices delivered:
@ifarmgirl(4/5) tipped @jahanzaibanjum
ifarmgirl tipped intishar
vikbuddy tipped ifarmgirl
intishar tipped ifarmgirl

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Yep, it is hard and sad to see how relationships loose touch with time. The memories last us for lifetime. Important is when we get time and occasion keep creating these moments with the loved ones. Cheers to Friends and Family ☺️ !LUV !PIZZA

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Truth there. We can't hold on to everyone as time goes by so it's best to create memories with those we have at present. Thank you and cheers :)

!LUV

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It was nice to reminisce about those years when our families were a lot closer to each other despite the physical distances.

Family is your intangible wealth. you mental and physical well-being has a direct bearing with your family. For a kid, the immediate environment is its family fro which it receives its instincts and impulses.

Social relationship in family is like wine, the older it gets, the greater potency it achives to trigger nostalgia.

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Very true. It's those old memories that keep the fondness and remembering them brings about some nostalgia.

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only get to meet during wakes or like yesterday, funerals.

This is so sad, as people make out time for these things but not for celebrations of life.

@ifarmgirl this was indeed a thoughtful post, thanks for sharing as it made me nostalgic too.

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It is saddening but that's how it is for most, I guess. Life has its way of making us realize things over the years :) Thank you, !LADY

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That’s why there is an adage that says twenty kids cannot play for a whole of twenty years. There will always be change of priority, relocation and so much more

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Perfectly said. Changes are inevitable and growing apart also means we are expanding :)

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It's just like the old times, we used to spend time with each other in the same way, but now since technology has progressed, mobiles have progressed, so nowadays we don't have time to talk to each other.

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Yes. It's common for everyone I think. Time goes by, things evolve and changes happen.

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(Edited)

That reminds me the marriage, family all togheter for once, then few weeks of more connecting, then nothing more at all...I guess that's how life goes

!LOLZ

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Yes, something like that. It's how life is indeed. Can't keep everyone around.

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Family moments are the best, especially when it is a united family, those moments stay with us throughout our lives.

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Yes, no matter the time that passes, the memories live on.

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I think it's normal for people to grow apart only to reconnect and reminisce about past event, growth is definitely a constant factor to that effect

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It's sad to think that this is common nowadays, especially when the person that keeps us together already left. We also fall apart., but I do wish that my bond with my siblings would always remain strong.❤️

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Yeah, it's pretty common and that's how life goes :) So habang close pa tayo sa mga loves natin, enjoy the moments and create more memories hehe.

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Time spend with family always last forever and never fade away. Since have relocated to another state, I always missed my family.

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Sorry to hear. Hope you get to visit and spend time with your family soon.

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Often the only time you see childhood friends is now at funerals!

At least you keep in touch with your bestie from college every so often CJ.

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We only meet in marriages or funerals....

I totally understand...
Keeping in touch, although is wanted could easily get hard...

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Yep. We all have priorities and some things simply get on the sidelines until they are forgotten at some point.

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You know sometimes I am brothered about relationships too, especially families and how we are drifting apart so much, not by choice of course but by circumstances beyond our control.
Even my siblings, no matter how hard I try to keep in touch with everyone, I still fall short of expectations. Life's pressures could be one of the culprits... Hahaha.

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I hear you :) It's funny how things go at times. I suppose our families understand our shortcomings :) !LADY

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As we grow, people come and go in our life and there are some that will that will remain. In either way, we should still maintain to be good to everyone

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Relationship comes and go and we must just be very careful of how we actually handle things at the end of the day

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Yep. Nothing lasts forever. We just have to make the most of it while we can because there is no guarantee that it will stay for life :)

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This was a fascinating read! And a very relatable one - I often wonder that about my own siblings, though coming from a fairly enmeshed family background, I think some distance would be advisable for my extended family.

Well, at least my BFF and I are seeing each other a few times each year.

Ah, the family we choose. <3 That's important, I think. And while it didn't turn out as you might've hoped two decades ago, presumably you're not in a place in life where you'd exactly want to spend every weekend face-down in a bucket of tequila anymore anyway, right?

We grow as we move. It's up to us if we grow together or apart. :)

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presumably you're not in a place in life where you'd exactly want to spend every weekend face-down in a bucket of tequila anymore anyway, right?

Haha, yeah. Although I didn't take it literally at that time. Come to think about it, we don't even drink beer these days, so Tequila would be a no-no 😅

We grow as we move. It's up to us if we grow together or apart. :)

Very well said. You made a great point there. Thank you 😉

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Agree ako. Minsan nagiging reunion ang burol or libing.

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Common yata. Nung childhood lng talaga buo. Then the cycle repeats sa mga anak natin and so on.

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In the old times, people used to spend a lot of time together. When technology wasn't advanced, they used to give each other a lot of time when there was a lot of understanding between them. That's why the bonding between them was so strong.

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That's very true. And even when I was a kid in the 80s and 90s. Technology and time continue to evolve and things change too.

!PIZZA

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