The turning point
As we grow older our roles and responsibilities in life and society begin to change, we begin to adapt to our present condition which sometimes does not in any way fit into the picture that we’ve always envisaged, but do we give up on life? Or do we adapt and continue to strive?
Independency - When is the first time you felt truly independent or older than your age?
I have always considered myself as one who grew earlier than her age, not body size wise but being exposed to the harsh reality of life.
My childhood was all rosy, I didn’t have to struggle to get anything until things took a different turn during my teenage years, what regular teenagers didn’t bother about, my siblings and I would bother, analyze, strategize, and restrategize.
While teens my age would spend every money given to them by their parents, uncles, and aunties, I and my siblings would save every penny because those pennies came in handy later in life.
The one time I felt truly independent in my life was when I went for my National Youth Service Corps years ago. That was the last time my father ever gave me money. I left the house with only the money for transportation that he gave me and in his words “You are now an adult, go and make your own money”. Lol, imagine your dad saying these words to you when you were about to leave home for the very first time in your life to stay in a foreign land for a whole year. No family to run to, just you and you alone and the 33k (27.5$) government pays you monthly for serving the country.
At that point in my life, I knew playing the pity card was not going to cut it, heck I knew that settling for less wasn’t part of the plan too neither was going back to my father’s house jobless after my service year, as the labour market in my country isn’t completely favourable to fresh graduates.
I knew that I didn’t have uncles or aunties in high places, I didn’t have any connection of whatsoever to give me a job or the good life that I had always dreamt of.
During that period I knew I was responsible for my future and the slightest mistake could ruin everything.
The first step I took was making sure I was posted to a good organization for my PPA (Place of Primary Assignment) but it wasn’t easy as tribalism and nepotism kept getting in the way.
I was first posted to a government school and was asked to teach a class of 150 students, students who were way bigger than me, I knew I couldn’t grow in such an environment as teaching has never been my thing and it meant that I would be going back to my father’s house after teaching for a year.
Excluding the whole teaching thingy, the accommodation was nothing to write home about, the place I was asked to stay was not secured, the doors weren’t strong as I could even break them with my tiny legs if I had tried to.
I complained, I wrote letters, I begged, I cried and I prayed. While other youth corpers were serving I was moving around with my box to get a good place for my PPA. People kept advising me to make do with the government school, I didn’t blame them as they were only seeing the present and not the future that I saw.
Finally, God showed up as the government school that I was assigned to was changed to a big organization, this happened because one of the girls my zonal inspector liked back then needed a good organization to serve at and he needed someone to “escort” her to the place and yours truly was the perfect “escort”😂😂
You know when God shows up? He uses any and everything at his disposal.
I started working and making money, I did other business on the side. I started sending my family money and gradually I was growing and the rest is history.
As much as I love to be independent there are times I wish I could let my guard down and be taken care of😃 even the strongest people in this world need to be pampered once in a while😃
All images are mine except otherwise stated.
Thanks for stopping by
Loads of Love🥰🥰
XOXO
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Thank you!
Lol, I can imagine how surprised or scared you would have been when your dad told you he wouldn't give U money again 😂
Baby girl lifestyle dey hungry U😊
Lol I tell you😂😂😂😂
Yes oooo🥰
😅😅
It's not bad, enjoy as much as you can o. Body no b firewood.
This is my fear and that of most of my friends. We're not done with school yet but we all know that this statement is inevitable. It'll come one day. So, to avoid it coming and breaking us when we least expect, we all have side hustles and whenever the allowance come in, we throw our hands in the air and scream hallelujah😂.
I pray at the end of the day, when it's time to serve the country, I'm not sent to a habitat where I can't survive the weather in Jesus name. 😂😂😂
Way to go my baby!!! Keep grinding and when the time comes you’d be super ready😃
Don’t worry God got you okay?🤗
Hahaha, escort Ibbtamy😂😂
Really, God's way is usually amazing
He shows up sometimes when we don't even expect it and yes, He can use anything to bless our lives
You know what, I love your desire not to settle for LESS and more reason why you kept searching for a better place instead of serving in the government school, you indeed saw the future and kept pursuing it
I also think that the statement from your Dad and the transportation fee alone he gave you was another motivation for you to face your responsibilities all by yourself
Glad about where you are today, boss lady, CEO of hive 😉
Thanks for sharing
Spot on Nkem!!
Thank you so much for this beautiful comment, it made my day😃
Lol I wonder when you’d stop calling me CEO of Hive oo😂😂
Hehehehe 😃
Not now!!!
So deal with it, I am sure you remember how it started, LOLZ
👏 Keep Up the good work on Hive ♦️ 👏
❤️ @nkemakonam89 suggested sagarkothari88 to upvote your post ❤️
I am with you on this, I have always felt this way and I was beginning to think I am of my mind😂 thank God I read this
Lol don’t worry sis you are not alone😂😂😂
Nysc can get expensive at some point but your dad sent you off with just your transport fare, I can't wrap my head around that though but it's kinda funny as well, now that's what being an adult does to us.
Yeah some people’s stories are way tougher than you can ever imagine😃
Thanks for stopping by my !Lady
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STOPThanks for sharing such an important part of your journey. As I grow old I find that the goal of independence can also sometimes end up leading to the sin of pride in it. Typically i see it in my elders, as they have been independent all their lives and now it is difficult for them to accept and make peace with being dependent on the next generation in their older days.
My way is that when young one should strive to be independent, like your father and circumstances guided you to be. And generally speaking by the time you are in your thirties you should have the capacity to survive on your own. However, this should not become a constraint, and when you find the right partner in life, or when you find the right professional team at work, you should be a little bit dependent on them for certain things, as long as they are dependent on you for other things. Basic symbiosis. That is the only way we can do bigger and better things, through active collaboration. And the safety net that if all goes wrong we are able to manage on our own anyways :)
Great post, made me think on my own thoughts quite a bit :)
Cheers from a fellow #dreemerforlife
I honestly never thought about this, thank you so much for this advice Brijwhiz, it means a lot to me😃
When one does not have uncles or aunts in high places one tends to mature and grow up so fast.
I'm happy the NYSC thing opened doors for you and things turned out well from that moment. Keep on crushing your life goals dear #dreemerforlife
Thank you dearest Funshee, this was so sweet❤️❤️
👆 THIS! 💗
So happy for you that you were blessed with this opportunity, and when it came your way, you made the most of it.
Teaching a class of 150 students? 😱
#dreemerforlife
Thank you so much Sam. I am
So grateful to God😃
Yeah, Government schools are over populated around here.
Thanks for reading my !Lady🥰
God always have his own way of helping us, even without uncle's and Aunty's in high places.
I'm glad you didn't stop pushing.
God use the lover man to favor you, and you didn't resist the offer by refusing to escort your friend.
Sending love and light dear one
Thank you dearest friend, indeed God works in a mysterious way.
Thanks for taking the time to read my !Lady, see you around🥰
What a beautiful story you shared here. You knew what you wanted and pursued it. God being by you side it became a reality although the obstacles were there. I'm glad you're doing fine now.
I am grateful to God that everything worked out well eventually😃
I like this story, how you were not willing to settle for less... you hoped for the best, prayed for the best, worked for the best, and then it appeared! Kudos for not backing down! I love those pics of you, too! Your smile in the first pic is wonderful, and that monochrome portrait is superb! You could be a model, girlfriend, seriously! 💜
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Thank you so much dearest Kitty for this heart warming comment, it means a lot to me and thanks for taking the time to read😃😃
Stories like this are inspirational. You knew what you wanted and you were determined to get it, and you got it. It is good that one pursue his or her dream with every zeal. Kudos.
Thank you so much dear friend😃
You are welcome.